so...this is where im at.

I need to do something. I just dont know what yet. I'm restless. I need to find something, to spend my time doing. we will see what soon, the answer will come, once the questions are posed.

give a little, give a alot...

I was reading over some of my old IM's from 8th grade. It is incredible how much more mature I am, even though I feel like the exact same person I was so long ago. I am far more moral, and upstanding. I wouldn't say or do half of the things I would have back then, but still it amazes me how much I've changed. I'm not who I was, as they say. Although I realized when you don't care what you say or who you offend you tend to be a lot more witty and sarcastic. I was both of those things, I've chosen to be neither for so long now, I'm not sure I could ever be them again. I'm kind of glad to be the person I've become. I realized in the last week, that although I'm only 17 I have at least 10 people or more who look up to me for some kind of advice or solace in their lives. It's very strange, but I like to take care of people. I enjoy it. Being a leader isn't something that is easy, but it is something that you are given, can't take for granted or credit for. God gave me this strength, so I owe it, like everything else to him. I just thought I'd talk about that, because its pretty prevalent in my life right now. Things are good. I'm excited.

p.s.
I'm now 17, just a heads up for future reference, yes I can see R rated movies now.

Heres a video:

sometimes it's hard to get motivated.

people run sometimes. but there are always two ways to run, away from something, and after something. I know someone who is very close, and running. I am also running, but im running after alot of things. chasing them. its a bitter fight, but i think in the end ill be alright. ok. im tired.bye.

sometimes, the world takes unexpected turns.

I never would have thought this would happen, in a million years. To see it crumble and fall like that, just fall apart like peices in a game of jenga. It doesn't make much sense to me, but he has a reason and he has a plan. I will follow it wherever it leads me, to whatever destination. I know where my life is going, I just cant keep track of where the people fit into the places in it. Who knows who will be where in my life, what positions, what places they will keep. Only god really. He is going to make me happy, he already has. He will make them happy, her, him, everyone who needs that joy right now, will be happy. God loves me, and I talked to him tonight. He loves you too, and you should do that same. I dont know exactly what is going to happen, but whatever it is, i know that god is the one who says it should, and he will never lead me astray. I follow him out of the darkness, out of the sorrow of my life, and into the light of the life he has planned for me.

night,
David.